Rumor has it...

As a response to the slew of viral e-smears that have been circulating the internet, a Slate writer comes up with his own e-mail filled with the sorts of goodies all proper Americans want to hear about Barack Obama. Some excerpts:

Barack Obama has the DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE tattooed on his stomach. It's upside-down, so he can read it while doing sit-ups.

There's only one artist on Barack Obama's iPod: FRANCIS SCOTT KEY.

Barack Obama goes to church every morning. He goes to church every afternoon. He goes to church every evening. He is IN CHURCH RIGHT NOW.

Barack Obama's skin is the color of AMERICAN SOIL.